Integrity is a part of the code we live by as Christians. Our word is depended upon by others. We need to know that we can trust each other in the small stuff, or how will we ever trust in the important stuff. All of which is why I was so troubled when a friend was dishonest with me. I wish my friend had simply spoken the truth. It wouldn’t have been hard to say, “I forgot. It slipped my mind. I couldn’t.” . . . Or any number of simple, easily forgivable reasons. Instead my friend told me something I knew was less than true.

Trust is breached when we choose dishonesty. This is especially so, when we consider the person to be a friend . . . A friend that we have trusted in the past and hoped to trust in the future. I’m not sure all that motivated the lie, but I do know that it hurt. The odd thing about the lie, was that it didn’t accomplish what it was meant to do. I was disappointed in my friend. All of which caused me to rethink the friendship. Did I want to be around a person I couldn’t trust? What could I believe that this friend told me? What other lies had I been told?

The writer of the book of Proverbs says of friendship, “A friend loves at all times.” (Proverbs 17:17) I think that love means that we can be honest when we slip up in friendship. It is alright to admit that our thoughts were elsewhere, and what we should have done, we didn’t do. It is in fact better to be truthful than to hide behind a lie.

To have a lasting friendship is truly a gift. Our friends bless us with their care and faithfulness, through the persistence of their presence in our lives. We may live long distances from our friends, yet with a phone call or visit, years fall away. When a friend hurts, we hurt. We celebrate with friends the joy of life. Relationships grown through the years bring laughter to our hearts and joy to our spirits. I’m grateful for friends who have shared my journey . . . For those who have been with me in good times as well as bad. I’m grateful for friends that I can trust.

I’m grateful for another friendship . . . the friendship that comes in Jesus Christ. This friend will never lie to me, will always be with me, offering both grace and compassion. It is a friendship that will not end, with one whom I can always trust.

*A version of this post was previously published on February 2, 2015, as “Friendship Is Built on Trust”